(Author’s Note: Hey folks! Hope you’ve been paying attention and watching things. Even in the weirdness of school, I have had time to write. You all should be able to read my latest piece, Her Last Performance. The music will really make that one pop. Otherwise, here’s this week’s Fictioneers offering! Enjoy!)
Playing It Safe
by Miles H. Rost
“Got another one for you.”
The desk clerk looked up from his newspaper, and at Riley Martin, the ambulance driver.
“Where did you find them?”
“Park Bench, Glen Martin Park, Irish Street side.”
There have been at least four that came from there, Riley thought.
“What was their condition?”
“Paralyzed, but with tears on the face and a voice saying ‘Brenda.'”
“Got a name on him?”
“Yep. Tyrone Brandon, aged 19. Student at the local U. Where should I put him?”
“Cell 6. We’ll prepare him soon.”
The paramedic wheeled Tyrone to the cell, and closed the doors, turning the wheels.
Another guest, checking into the Heartbreak Hotel.
Heartbreak Hotel. Very clever.
Well, if you’re gonna heal from a broken heart, may as well be from behind iron doors. HA!
I confess to being confused by the switch from singular to plural and back again.
Something I learned in my short fiction class. It’s fun to experiment! 😀
I love this idea – picking people up by ambulance for their broken hearts. But I’m not sure about using ‘them’ and then switching to ‘he’ – makes it very confusing who you’re talking about.
That’s intentional. Them is also used as a way to disguise “she” or “he” until such time as you want to make the reveal.
Something I learned this week in class. Again, experimentation! 😀
I was confused by the switch too. Went back wondering where the others were…
Them is also used as a general term if you don’t want to identify the gender right away. ^_-
Yes, I do realise that!
Shouldn’t that be Lonely Street? 😉
Good story and interesting experiment. Experimenting is great fun with flash fic. Do people really use ‘they and them’ for one person when they don’t know the gender? That’s sounds very odd to me.
This was fun, imagine the idea – Heartbreak Hotel. Me thinks it would be overbooked all the time.
Hmm, maybe a serial heartbreaker operating in Glenn Martin Park?
It could be…
Loved the music. Experiments are great but you could lose your reader in a longer piece due to the confusion they experience. I too wondered where they had gone. Interesting to break the rules though in flash and make a decision whether or not it works. Great concept with heart break hotel.