Currently writing this on the road…in Suwon, South Korea (the capital of Gyeonggi Province). Enjoy what my mind throws up!
Manic Monday
by Miles Rost
I never thought I knew of a place called hell. That is, until I found myself in a delivery job in Beverly Hills.
“You need to drop the first set of packages in the back alley behind the consignment store next to the Victoria’s Secret on Rodeo Drive, but not the Victoria’s Secret expansion across the alley,” my boss told me.
It was like he was speaking Korean to me. I looked at him sideways.
“What’s the name of the consignment store?” I asked.
“How am I supposed to know? I don’t do deliveries!”
So I went with my gut and looked for the Victoria’s Secret store. There were 5 of them within 2 blocks of Rodeo Drive. So I put them in the back alley, on a building that said “Rags to Riches”, next to the Victoria’s Secret.
I was fired the next day for incompetence. When my boss couldn’t even tell me the right place.
I think I’m going to go to the beach and punch a mime.
Do you know most mimes don’t actually like their work? Most of them don’t have any real passion for it, and are just going through the motions.
I liked this – never had a boss like it, but you hear plenty of stories like it. Well done.
(also, apologies for the mime joke).
I bust out laughing at it! XD
Never pick on a mime. But then again, if you do, he’ll never live to talk about it.
gold!
Dear Miles,
Three things. One..I worked once on Rodeo Drive installing computerized awnings for Cartier Jewelers. Strangest time. Two…I loved your last line. Perfect. Three…Our bus driver and Royal Purple People Eater, Rochelle, was a mime, so be careful.
Aloha,
Doug
Rochelle was probably a better mime than the normal ones…XD
Dear Miles,
I see you have a knack for backpedaling. Nicely played. 😉 All mime aside, I enjoyed your story.
Going back to my imaginary box now.
Shalom,
Rochelle
When you’re a teacher for actual education companies, you have to learn how to backpedal…or else they’ll take you with them. 🙂
Good one, Miles, and a good last line. I understand the frustration at the boss!
janet
Miles, I read this a few days ago on my phone but since I was half-asleep, I didn’t comment. This really made me laugh and seems pretty close to the truth. Great story. 🙂
I once almost got fired after three days on the job. I said, What could i have done wrong? i was still shaking everyone’s hands, saying, Hi, my name is Randy, and smiling until my jaws hurt. But then again, people need other people to cover up for their competencies.
I say, if that’s true, go ahead and punch another mime.
I’ve never heard anyone say that punching out mimes is politically incorrect – yet.
Randy
Make that “incompetencies”, please.
On second thought, maybe I got fired not for shaking hands, smiling, and saying my name, but for my typo’s. After all I was hied to tipe (sic).
Now, where’s that mime?
‘punch a mime’ that’s classic!!! loved your take!